Lighthouse Thoughts

Approximately forty percent of all children adopted are toddlers between the ages of one and four. Adopting a toddler is not the same as adopting an infant or newborn.  Parenting techniques will be different depending on whether you adopt a younger or older toddler. His life experience and developmental level; not chronological age, will determine […]

It’s not unusual to find one spouse ready to start looking at adoption before the other is ready.  During this time, it is important to keep the ones of communication open.  Acknowledge your spouses reluctance and discuss concerns openly and honestly.    If your spouse’s reaction is not what you had expected, they may need more […]

• Remain Calm, count to ten, and most importantly, and don’t lose your temper.• Learn the child’s native language. (This was invaluable.)• Remember your child is scared. Try to find ways to reassure and comfort him.• Don’t self diagnose or assume your child has a medical condition, developmental or behavioral disorder based on a short […]

Adoptions can be accomplished with a variety of help. Adoption agencies, attorneys who specialize in adoption, even unlicensed facilitators work with adoptive parents around the world. In order to assure the best chance of success and the least number of problems, adoptive parents must have guidance in choosing who they will entrust with helping them […]

     How do my parents or in-laws view adoption?  Will they accept him as part of the family? Will they view my child differently or treat her different than the other grandchildren? These are all legitimate concerns that prospective adoptive parents have. Even when grandparents are “on board” with the adoption of a grandchild […]

Eleanor Roosevelt said that “ a woman is like a tea bag – you can’t tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.” This is especially true if you put her in a position where one of the most fundamental elements of being a women are denied: motherhood and infertility are […]

Deciding to move forward with an adoption is often the culmination of a lot of time, research, and soul searching. When it’s time to choose, there are many reasons why people decide domestic versus international adoption. When it comes to adoption, there is no right or wrong. It is an extremely personal decision and adoptive […]

Shortly before the adoption of our daughter, my husband’s Great Uncle Pete came to live with my inlaws. Uncle Pete was a widower; Aunt Thea had passed away some 30 years prior and they didn’t have any children. Known as an “Outlaw”, rather than an inlaw because he had married into the family and was […]

The Reluctant Dad originally ran in the Beacon House, June 2009, Newsletter. We received such positive response that we have ran every year since. D.Hoppenhauer The Reluctant Dad Other than the infertility issues we have experienced, everything is good. Why change that? My wife wants to adopt, but I’m not sure. Do I want to […]

If you’ve ever read any of the Beacon House newsletters or blogs, you might have heard me talk about all the first time events you share with your adopted child: his first smile, the first time he says Mommy, the first birthday party, and first day of school. But this week, as my youngest child approaches […]